Things to Know Before ‘Coming Out’

Coming out can be a hard and stressful time if you have no or very little support networks around you. Wondering ‘how to tell people im gay’ and ‘what will they say’ are common questions that may cross your mind before you take the next step of coming out. Things you should know before coming out as ‘gay’ or ‘lesbian’ are listed below.

  1. Acceptance begins with you.

“Acceptance” is a phrase that takes on a whole new significance when you come out. You will find that there will be individuals, even people that you care about, who’ will not accept you for being homosexual. In addition to that, you might not even find acceptance in the homosexual community. You might end up trying to become more masculine or more feminine simply to match. However, while approval from others may feel really great, do not forget that you cannot be so frightened of losing people that you end up losing yourself along the way. There will always be individuals that aren’t happy with the way you are, and that may hurt. A lot. However, when you accept yourself, you build confidence within yourself, and nobody’s opinion could take everything from you.

  1. You are likely to feel a great deal of stress to look a specific way.

It seems good to be looked at and appreciated, particularly now because you can do it in return. However, you’ll soon understand that the gay community appears to be populated with Calvin Klein versions, and you may look at yourself and feel like you do not measure up. There will be body molds and types that you’ll be advised to strive for and look like and there will be pressure everywhere to conform. Homosexual media does not help. However, you have to keep in mind that you are fine just the way you are, and you should apply that favorable attitude into the homosexual people around you.

  1. You are likely going to want to protect your platonic friendships that are homosexual.

All your buddies are fantastic and you need to cherish them. However, there will come a time when a boy breaks your heart or somebody calls you a slur, and you’ll want somebody who actually understands. Platonic homosexual friends are like unicorns and you should protect them as such. Oh, and certainly do not let any boy encounter between you. It is never worth it.

  1. You are likely going to have to pick and choose your battles.

You just came out, and suddenly the world seems more bigoted than ever. The simple fact is it has always been this way. You are simply awake to it now. As an out gay person, you’ve got the chance to talk out and use your voice to change the world. Nonetheless, it’s important to keep in mind that you cannot fight every battle, and it is incredibly exhausting on your psychological wellbeing to always be mad. Save your energy and utilize it if it is actually needed.

  1. You were once closeted too. Do not pressure people.

Sure, it is annoying when that man you need to date just cannot seem to accept the fact that he’s homosexual and come out. However he does not owe that to you or anyone else. People today come out whenever they are good and ready, just like you did. Cut them some slack.

  1. Keep an eye out for your entire community.

Community is vital, LGBT background is critical, and although you might not ever know the struggles of others it’s still possible to encourage them just as they have supported you. The are support groups such as Startout who focus on helping the LGBT community in resilience and self-acceptance.

  1. Do not be ashamed that you did not do it earlier.

When you see that 18-year-old who was out of the closet for 2 Years, you are likely going to be jealous. Why could you not have come out earlier? Why did you waste so much time? But bear in mind that everybody is on a different course in life. The most significant issue is that you just take this moment, right here, right now, to be the very best, fullest that you are. Who knows? Perhaps some young man will notice that and pick: Now is the day that I come out.

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